"Martha, will you show her where we keep the, uh, euphemism?"
Who Is Afraid of Virginia Woolf, 1962
Certain subjects are considered personal or sensitive and therefore
somewhat improper to talk about in public. That's where euphemisms come
handy. You give the clue and people fill in the juicy sensory-memory
details themselves. A euphemism may be spitefully nasty or involve sharp
criticism. Well, anger and spite have their uses, too. But it is a lot
nicer/wiser to make do with a little gentle intellectual amusement. How
about this one? "Politicians are known for being economical with the
truth." i.e. They lie a lot, especially those in the government.
Let us begin with a nice, harmless euphemism: "to be in the family
way" = hamile
she was in the family way; that's why they got married.
But, there's one even more
euphemistic: to have a bun in the oven: "Have you heard that Meltem
has a bun in the oven?" Eh, "mercimeği fırına vermek" için uğramışken,
yanına taze bir somun da katık edilmez mi?
Unemployment: "between jobs" = out of work, işsiz = "He is between jobs
at the moment."
Unemployment again: "He/She
is a resting actor/actress" :? Yıldızlar hiç işsiz kalır mı? Yalnızca
"dinlenirler" -- tabii, iş ararken!
Another great euphemism:
"Tired and emotional"... "The paper added that President Sarkozy
appeared tired and emotional," which means, "Apparently he had had a
(wee) bit too much to drink." In other words, "He was a bit worse for
wear." Or, in plain truth, "He had over-indulged in whatever he had been
"He's gone to see a man
about a dog (horse)." :)) What does that mean? Bir köpek veya at
konusunda adamın biriyle görüşmeye mi gitmiş ne?
"go to see a man about a dog
(horse)" is used to apologize for but not mention the real reason for
one's departure of any length or inability to attend a future event. In
Britain, it usually means "going to the loo". Well, whats the ladylike
expression, then? Im going to powder my nose. Is that the reason why
there are lots and lots of poems glorifying the beloveds shiny
glimmering eyes, but none pampering her about her shiny nose with a
glossy glow? (save for tons of eulogies over Rudolps shiny new year
nose.) (You didnt know, did you, that male reindeer lose their antlers
by December. So, all of Santas reindeer, including Rudoph, must be
full and frank discussion:
"The directors had a full and frank discussion in the meeting."
have words with someone:
"Those two have had words."
be disadvantaged: "The
government is introducing new schemes to help the disadvantaged."
financially embarrassed: "I'm afraid I can't come to the restaurant with
you. I'm financially embarrassed at the moment."
Cast iron stomach
A person with a cast iron stomach can eat or drink anything without any
Imagine you are a teacher;
the parents of the class idiot come to school and ask Hows my child
doing? you cant just say Your child is stupid. because parents
generally hate that. So you say Your child is a little slow meaning
they learn, just they learn at a slower pace than other students. Of
course what they really meant was that the child was a little stupid.
Your child seems a little
A more polite term than "fatty".
Letting the Horsey Out of
In other words, your fly is undone.
Polite euphemism for a male homosexual.
If you are in your birthday suit, you are naked.
small penis = stealthy entrance
masturbating = checking ammo
The Vatican Roulette
Another term for the rhythm method, the only form of birth control
endorsed by the Catholic Church. Feeling lucky?
Real Estate revarication, i.e. downright lies.
Cozy One of my favorite terms. It means the home is too small for
human habitation. Remember the 19th Century when a family of six could
live in a single room home? This is the home for them.
Intimate The only home smaller than cozy. These homes are perfect
if youre roughly the size of a garden gnome.
Charming If youre used to living without indoor plumbing, this home
is perfect for you. It comes complete with old woodwork, wide molding,
and kitchen cabinets that date before the Great Depression. The cobwebs
are an added bonus.
Conveniently Located It is located at a busy intersection, where the
traffic noise is so heavy, youll have to sleep with ear plugs. Easy
Highway Access This is actually worse than Conveniently Located.
Here youll have to sleep with pillows duct taped to your head.
Country Living We hope you like spending a lot of time driving
because this home is located so far from civilization that you may have
to raise your own animals in order to survive.
City Living- Lock the doors with all three deadbolts because its not
safe to go outside.
Needs Some TLC Beware. You might fall through the floor.
Water View If you stand on a ladder in the corner bedroom of the
second floor and lean out the window, you might be able to see it.
Water Front Located in a flood zone.
Not a Drive-By Because the exterior is so hideous, youre likely to
drive by without stopping. You might even look over your shoulder to see
if condemned signs have been placed in the yard yet.
Must See The Inside This is a variation of Not a Drive-By. The
outside looks like its been decorated for Halloween, but its currently
March. The Addams Family actually turned this home down.
Handyman Special So special that not even the walls are solid. The
home is probably ready to collapse.
Unique This home is so unique that it will only appeal to a small
percentage of the population. In fact, the number of buyers who would
appreciate the architecture is so small that were still hoping some
weird person from southern California takes a job relocation and moves
to the area.
Easy to Show The prior owners vacated the home as soon as they heard
the gunfire down the street. The doors dont shut properly, so pretty
much anyone can go in anytime theyd like.
Only One Owner And he didnt make an update since the day he built
the home forty-seven years ago.
Freshly Painted With a single coat of cheap paint.
Cul-de-sac Living A fancy way to say youll be living at a
Friendly Neighborhood In fact, several busy bodies will watch your
every move and the creepy guy across the street has a telescope trained
on this home at all times.
It's time to discharge the trash, dump the dummy, jettison the jerk.
/CÖ:K/ = (argo) sersem, budala.
Doç. Dr. Yalçın İzbul