(all sound files are in .wav format)





01... 176K

Archbishop: Why?
Mozart: Why what sir?
Archbishop: Why do I have to be humiliated in front of my guests? By one of my own servants? The more license I allow you the more you take!
Mozart: If his grace is not satisfied with me he can dismiss me.

02... 141K

Mozart: The director has actually torn up a huge section of my music! They say I have to rewrite the opera! But it's perfect as it is! I can't rewrite what's perfect!

03... 134K

Mozart: Is the Emperor angry with me?
Unknown: Quite the contrary...
Mozart: Then why doesn't he simply appoint me to the post?
Unknown: Mozart, you are not the only composer in Vienna.
Mozart: No, but I'm the best!



01... 117K

Dr. Sobel: Oedipus was a Greek king who killed his father and married his mother.
Paul Vitti: (Sighs)....Fuckin' Greeks!

02... 98K

Paul Vitti: If I talk to you, and you turn me into a fag.....I'm gonna kill you, you understand?



01... 123K

Jim: I have an announcement that I would like to make! There is a gorgeous woman....masturbating on my bed!
Finch: Thank you, Nadia!
Kevin: You know, if you ever had a chance with Nadia....this is it!

02... 61,6K

Jim: You know we're all going to go to college as realize this, right? I mean they probably have special dorms for people like us.

03... 118K

Jim's Dad: Look at the expression on her face....You see that? See what she's doing? She kind of looking right into your eyes saying, "Hey big boy! Heeey....How ya doin'?" You see?
Jim: Right.

04... 89K

Oz: All that you gotta do is ask them questions, and listen to what they have to say and shit.
Stifler: I dunno, man, that sounds like a lot of work!



01... 125K

President: 10:15 is American Fisheries?
Janie: Yes sir, they're giving you a 200 pound halibut.
President: Janie, make a note. We need to schedule more events where somebody gives me a really big fish.
Janie: Yes sir!
President: Janie, I'm kidding.
Janie: Of course, sir.

02... 101K

Louis: Mr. President, I really feel that....
President: Louis, however much coffee you drink in the morning , I want you to reduce by half.
Louis: I don't drink coffee, sir.
President: Hit yourself over the head with a baseball bat, would you please?
Louis: Yes, sir.

03... 104K

President: It appears to be a letter from the entire environmental community. These people are out of control!
Louis: Well, they're frustrated, Mr. President.
McCall: Are they blaming the President for global warming?
Louis: Well, they don't think he caused it, if that's what you mean.



01... 115K

Thomas Becket: Honour is a concern of the living. One cannot very well be concerned with it once one's dead.
King Henry: You're too clever for me Thomas. But I know there's something not quite right about your reasoning.

02... 112K

King Henry: Have you any idea how much trouble I took to make you a noble?
Thomas Becket:
I think so. I recall you pointed a finger and said, "Thomas Becket, you are noble." The queen and your mother were very agitated.
King Henry: Hahahaha!



01... 77K

Sonny: What the hell is this?
Tessio: It's a Sicilian message. It means Luca Brasi sleeps with the fishes.

02... 74K

Don Corleone: I have a sentimental weakness for my children and I spoil them as you can see. They talk when they should listen.



01... 43K

Simon Templar: You've got to get away from me!
Dr. Emma Russell:
I'm not going anywhere until you tell me why you lied to me.



01... 140k

Morpheus: Welcome, Neo. As you no doubt have guessed, I am Morpheus.

02... 115k

Morpheus: As long as The Matrix exists, the human race will never be free.

03... 123k

Neo: I know what you're trying to do.
Morpheus: I'm trying to free your mind, Neo. But I can only show you the door. You're the one who has to walk through it.



01... 109K

Agent K: Our mission, is to monitor extra-terrestrial activity on Earth.

02... 86K

Agent J: You know how to use these things?
Agent K: No idea whatsoever.

03... 67K

Agent K: We work for a highly funded, yet unofficial government agency.



01... 111K

Lecter: I do wish we could chat longer, but I'm having an old friend for dinner. Bye...

02... 90K

Clarice: If you didn't kill him then who did, sir?
Lecter: Who can say? Best thing for him, really. His therapy was going nowhere.



01... 118K

Kirk: The Klingons have never been trustworthy. I'm forced to agree with Admiral Cartwright. This is a.....TERRIFYING idea...
Spock: It is imperative that we act now to support the Gorkon initiative.

02... 110K

Spock: The dismantling of our space stations and starbases along the neutral zone. An end to almost 70 years of unremitting hostility, which the Klingons can no longer afford.

03... 84K

Klingon at table: Captain Kirk, I thought Romulan Ale was illegal.
Kirk: One of the advantages of being a thousand light years from Federation Headquarters.

04... 71K

Kirk: We haven't fired!
Spock: Captain....According to our databanks, we have......Twice.

05... 113K

Kirk: They're animals!!
Spock: Jim, there is a historic opportunity here.
Spock: They are dying...

06... 64K

Spock: There is an old Vulcan proverb...."Only Nixon can go to China."

07... 97K

Bones: Spock, this "child" is about to wipe out every living thing on earth. Now what do you suggest we do, spank it.

08... 77K

Kirk: Well, Bones, do the new medical facilities meet with your approval?
Bones: They do not. It's like working in a damn computer center.



01... 88K

Clark: What can I do with 5 dollars?
Blackjack Dealer: Gee, I don't know. Buy a bullet and rent a gun? Hahaha!

02... 40K

Cousin Eddie: It's people like you that blow the family nestegg that built this town.

03... 80K

Blackjack Dealer: Why don't you give me half the money you were going to bet, then we'll go out back, I'll kick you in the nuts and we'll call it a day!

04... 121K

Clark: Did you know that blackjack is the only game where a smart player has a mathematical advantage over the house?
Girl at blackjack table: Are you a professional?
Clark: Hmm? Nah, not really....Are you?

05... 92K

Clark: Eddie, don't you worry about radiation?
Cousin Eddie: All I know, Clark, is that my teeth have never been whiter, and my garden's spittin' out 50 pound tomatoes!

06... 94K

Cousin Eddie: Oh yeah! Yuban coffee! You know, you can sprinkle that stuff on anything? Ice cream, mashed potatoes, or just eatin' right out of the can for a quick pick-me-up