Yabancı XXX Fıkra: Türkçe Açıklamalı İngilizce XXX Fıkralar, World's Funniest XXX Jokes, Kesinlikle Dünyanın En Komik XXX Fıkraları,

Doç. Dr. Yalçın İzbul, "Practical English For Turks"

   Copyrighted 2001-2014

 WEBSİTE     TESTLER     KARİKATÜR     EĞLENCE

 

ingilizce seti süper

fikralar     .SÜPER İNGİLİZCE EĞİTİM SETİ.   fikralari

ingilizce seti süper

TIKLAYINIZ... Ayrı Pencere Açılacaktır

 
 

 

 

yabancı xxx fıkralar

 

XXX -- FIKRA -- 05

 

 

xxx fıkrası xxx fıkrası xxx fıkrası

yabancı xxx fıkralar

SURE TO BE SACKED !!

Two weeks ago was my forty-fifth birthday, and I wasn't feeling too hot that morning anyway. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say "Happy Birthday," and probably have a present for me.

wasn't feeling too hot = (colloquial) pek havamda değildim... anyway = zaten...

She didn't even say Good Morning, let alone Happy Birthday.

I thought, "Well, that's wives for you. Maybe the children will remember."

The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word.

When I started to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary, Janet, said, "Good morning boss, Happy Birthday." And I felt a little better; someone had remembered.

feeling low = çökkün hissediyor... despondent = ümitsiz, kederli...

I worked until noon. Then Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me."

I said, "By George, that's the best thing I've heard all day. Let's go."

By George! = "Tanrı adına!" yahut "Oh, be!" vb. türünden bir ünlem. Tabii, "Aziz George" kastediliyor... Bütün ünlemler gibi, anlamını bağlam belirleyecektir...

We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go; we went out into the country to a little private place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.

On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?"

I said, "No, I guess not."

She said, "Let's go to my apartment."

After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable."

slip into something more comfortable = üstüme daha rahat birşeyler giyeceğim...

"Sure," I excitedly replied.

She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my wife, children and dozens of our friends!

All were singing "Happy Birthday" and there on the couch I sat... quite naked.

Ve bendeniz orada, kanapede oturmaktaydım... çırılçıplak !!

 

xxx fıkra

 

LOOKING FOR A MAN

The local classified ads columns read: "Rich widow looking for a man to share life and fortune with the following qualifications:

1. Won't beat me up...

2. Won't run away...

3. Has to be great in bed...

read = yazıyordu ["diye okunuyordu" kavramından]... rich widow = zengin dul... to share life and fortune = hayatımı ve servetimi paylaşacak... following qualifications = aşağıdaki nitelikler...

For several months, her phone rang off the hook, her doorbell was ringing constantly, she received tons of mail... all to no avail. None of the men seemed to meet her qualifications.

rang off the hook = durmadan çalıyordu ["ahize çengelinden düşüyordu" kavramından: eski kancalı duvar telefonlarını gözünüzde canlandırınız. [Nitekim "to hang up" deyimi de "telefonu kapatmak" anlamına gelmiyor mu? Yani, ahizeyi yerine asmak]... to no avail = hiçbir sonuç vermeksizin...

Then one day the doorbell rang yet again. She opened the door to find a man, with no arms and no legs, lying on the welcome mat. Perplexed, she asked, "Who are you and what do you want?"

yet again = bir kez daha; ve yine... mat /MÆT/ = kapı paspası... perplexed = şaşırmış, akıl erdirememiş halde...

"Hi," said the man "Your search is over, for I am the man of your dreams. I've got no arms, so I can't beat you up and I've got no legs, so I can't run away."

The old woman asked, "What makes you think you're so great in bed?"

To which he replied, "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"

 

xxx fıkra

 

THE REVENGE

Joan, the town gossip and supervisor of the town's morals, recently accused George, a local man, of being an alcoholic, because she saw his pickup truck parked outside the town's only bar.

kasabanın dedikoducusu ve ahlak denetçisi... pickup truck = kaptıkaçtı...

George stared at her for a moment, and said nothing. Later that evening, he parked his pickup truck in front of her house and left it there all night.

 

xxx fıkra

Yabancı XXX Fıkra: Türkçe Açıklamalı İngilizce XXX Fıkralar, World's Funniest XXX Jokes, Kesinlikle Dünyanın En Komik XXX Fıkraları,

Doç. Dr. Yalçın İzbul, "Practical English For Turks"

   Copyrighted 2001-2014

xxx fıkra

 

NO MORE SECS !!

I called my 7-year old son to dinner last night, telling him that it was almost ready.

"Just a sec," he answers.

just a sec = bir saniyecik... (= second)

Five minutes passed, and "Dinner time," I called to him again...

"Just a sec," is again the answer...

"No more secs!!" I shouted, "I warned you a few minutes ago."

Silence, as he continued working on whatever project he was working on. I reached over and took it away from him:

whatever project = her ne proje ise... (Tabii burada bir "oyun projesi" kastediliyor...

"No more secs means NO MORE SECS !!!!"

ÇEVİRİSİ: "Saniye maniye dinlemem demek, saniye maniye dinlemem demektir!"

As I spoke the words, I realized I sounded just like my wife.

I sounded just like... etc = Tıpkı karım gibi konuşmuştum... Açıklaması: "no more secs": okunuşu aynen "no more sex" gibi...

 

xxx fıkra

 

THE REVENGE

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The salesgirl notices him and asks him if she can help him.

aisles = (okunuşu: /AYLZ/) koridor vb... Burada, "rafların arasında"... wander up and down = oraya buraya, aşağı yukarı dolanmak...

He answers that he's looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the correct aisle.

A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.

 cotton = pamuk... a ball of string = bir yumak ip/sicim... counter = tezgah...

She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?

confused = kafası karışmış...

He answers, "Yesterday I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers, because it's sooo much cheaper. So I figure if I have to roll my own, so does she!"

rolling papers = sigara sarmak için kağıt... so I figure... etc. = Ben de düşündüm ki, madem ben sigaralarımı kendim sarmak zorunda kalıyorum, o da tamponlarını kendisi dürsün!!

 

xxx fıkra

 

IF YOU'RE UP TO IT !!

Eğer Becerebileceksen !!

A nun is walking through a bad neighbourhood when this guy jumps out of the bushes and has his way with her.

has his way with her = muradına nail oldu, kadından istediğini elde etti (öykü anlatırken, present tense = past tense...)

When he has finished he says "Well, sister, what are you going to tell the Pope about this".

the Pope = Papa... Okunuşu: /POUP/...

The nun replies, "Well, I will tell him I was walking home late one night in a bad neighbourhood when this man jumped out of the bushes and had his way with me....twice -- that is, if you're up to it.

that is = yani, tabiidir ki... if you are up to it = eğer becerebileceksen... becerebilirsen... Deyim: to be up to something = üstesinden gelebilecek güce sahip olmak...

 

xxx fıkra

ingilizce seti süper

fikralar     .SÜPER İNGİLİZCE EĞİTİM SETİ.   fikralari

süper fıkralar

TIKLAYINIZ... Ayrı Pencere Açılacaktır

xxx fıkra

 

WHAT'S HIS NAME, AGAIN ?!

Neymiş adı, neymiş, bi daha söyle bakiim!

Little Indian boy goes to his father and asks, "Father, how do we get our names?"

Father tells his son, "Well, we name our children after the first thing we see when the child is born. For example, your sister, Running Doe... When she was born, the first thing your mother saw was a doe running through the woods.

doe = dişi geyik...

"And your cousin, Two Eagles... The first thing your aunt saw when he was born were 2 eagles flying over the village."

eagle = kartal...

Then, the father gets curious and asks the little boy: "So tell me, Two Dogs Fucking, why do you ask?"

 

xxx fıkra

 

WHAT IT MEANS TO AGE !!

Yaşlanmak Ne Demektir ??

It Takes Me All Night Long To Do What I Used To Do All Night Long

Eskiden bütün gece boyunca yaptığım şeyi yapabilmek şimdi bütün gecemi alıyor...

 

xxx fıkra

 

SHE KNOWS ALL THE CLUB MEMBERS INTIMATELY !!

Three women are in a gym locker room dressing up to do their exercises. Suddenly, a guy runs through the room wearing nothing but a bag over his head and passes the three women.

intimately = çok yakından... locker room = soyunma odası (çünkü odada kilitli soyunma dolapları var)...

He passes by the first woman, who looks down at his penis. "He's not my husband," she says.

pass by = yanından geçmek...

He passes by the second woman, who also looks down at his penis. "He's not my husband either." She says, also not recognizing the unit.

"unit" = "ünite, birim" -- burada tamamen mecazi...

He passes by the third woman, who also looks down as he runs by her.

"Wait a minute," she says. "He's not even a member of this club."

Wait a minute! etc = Hey, bir dakika... Bu adam bu kulübün üyesi bile değil!...

 

xxx fıkra

 

SUPERMAN RIDES AGAIN !

Süpermen Yine İşbaşında !

One day Superman was bored, as there was no crime in the city and little for him to do.

bored = canı sıkılmış (işsizlikten)...

Seeking excitement, he flew off to see his buddy Spiderman. "Hey, Spidee, how about going over to a bar for a cold beer?" But "Spidee" was too busy: "Sorry, not today."

seeking excitement = heyecan arayarak... buddy = arkadaş, can arkadaş...

This time, Superman visited Batman, who was also busy.

Lonely and dejected, Superman cruised around and flew by a brothel.

dejected /di-CEK-tid/ = ruhen çökkün... cruised around /KRU:ZD/ = etrafta gezindi... brothel = genelev... fly - flew - flown = uçmak...

Using his X-Ray vision, he looked inside to see Supergirl lying with legs wide-spread on a bed. Being horny, Superman flew right into the brothel, screwed Supergirl as fast as a speeding bullet, and flew right back out.

lying with legs wide-spread = bacakları açık yatmakta... horny = sex-starved = "abazan"... screwed = becerdi... a speeding bullet = hızla yol alan bir mermi (gibi)...

"What was that?" said Supergirl, startled.

"I don't know," said the Invisible Man as he climbed off of Supergirl, "but it hurt like hell!"

startled = şaşırmış, irkilmiş... the Invisible Man = Görünmeyen Adam... as he climbed off = üstünden kalkarken...

DİKKAT = Türkçe'deki "tırmanmak/inmek" gibi iki ayrı fiil yerine, İngilizce'de "to climb up" ve "to climb down", yani aynı eylemin yukarı ve aşağı yönde olanı var. Burada da aynı eylem bu kez "off" kavramı ile kullanılıyor...

 

seks fıkraları 04     yabancı fıkralar     seks fıkraları 06

 

 

 
 

Yabancı XXX Fıkra: Türkçe Açıklamalı İngilizce XXX Fıkralar, World's Funniest XXX Jokes, Kesinlikle Dünyanın En Komik XXX Fıkraları,

Doç. Dr. Yalçın İzbul, "Practical English For Turks"

   Copyrighted 2001-2014

 WEBSİTE     TESTLER     KARİKATÜR     EĞLENCE

 

ingilizce seti süper

fikralar     .SÜPER İNGİLİZCE EĞİTİM SETİ.   fikralari

ingilizce seti süper

  TIKLAYINIZ... Ayrı Pencere Açılacaktır